New Year’s Resolutions for Grievers

Well, I hope all of you have survived the holidays as well as can be expected and perhaps even given yourself the gift of feeling some joy.  Now we get to think about climbing another mountain by attempting to keep a few New Year’s resolutions (or not!)  Below is an excerpt from ’64 New Year’s Resolutions for Grievers’ posted by Litsa on Dec 30, 2013.  64 seemed way to daunting, so I’m just including the first 10.  I may include the remaining 54 in bite size blog pieces later on (or not!).  You can read the entire article at http://whatsyourgrief.com/64-new-years-resolutions-for-grievers/

Like many, I have a love/hate relationship with New Year’s resolutions.  On the one hand, they can be a great kick in the butt.  But on the other, they have the potential to make you feel like a total failure when you…well…fail.  Just the same, we thought coming up with a list of 64 grief resolutions would be a swell idea and we turned to you, our fabulous readers, for suggestions. OBVIOUSLY you delivered.

One of my favorites was a beautiful comment from Jeannette Brown, a Buddhist, who explained that “rather than make resolutions for grief, every morning and every evening we pray (by chanting, our form of prayer) for the happiness or repose of all of the deceased. We believe that if we continue our growth and pursuit of happiness, our deceased family and friends will continue to become happy as well”.   I love that sentiment so much, but as someone who just barely manages to commit to a shower every day, resolutions admittedly help keep me on track.

Whatever is right for you, grief resolution or no grief resolution, we hope you find the list of ideas below helpful in thinking about how you will grieve in 2014.

1. Be honest about how you feel, with yourself and with others.
2. Speak your loved ones name.
3. Live in a way your loved one would have wanted you to.
4. Support someone else.
5. Seek professional help.
6. Start a project memorializing or in memory of your loved one.
7. Brush off hurtful comments from well intentioned people.
8. Be open to happiness.
9. Let go of guilt about having fun or enjoying life.
10. Archive those old photos in an album or online.

At Grief Hope Network, we recognize there are several ways to help you feel better in the grief recovery process. Many people don’t feel comfortable in sharing their feelings with people they don’t know in traditional counseling sessions. As part of your online grief support, you can connect and communicate with other members at www.GriefHopeNetwork. I hope you enjoy this message. Please post your thoughts and comments in the chat room with others.

Gratefully,

Judy Davidson

Founding Member

Grief Hope Network